im. obsessed.

all are random, usually substance induced texts that ppl send to their friends which one of the parties then submits to the website. www.textsfromlastnight.com

(610):

Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.

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(706):

I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.

(1-706):

I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.

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(850):

We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.

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(586):

You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?

(1-586):

You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.

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(410):

To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.

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(256):

I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.

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(315):

Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.

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(240):

this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.

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(412):

the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime

(724):

...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname

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(604):

People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky

i would put more.. but i need to stop laughing & get back to "transcribed eukaryotic Mrna". hmph.